Seonbi Code

The Seonbi Code

We will work and play as a team.
We will respect all people, their feelings, and their rights.
We will trust our teachers.
We will be honest and do our best.

The festival that the teachers who did get asked to participate, is the Seonbi Festival. Ironic isn't it?

Underneath It ALL

This week is all about accepting me for me and that is all.......

BeyonceFlaws & All

Music Video Codes By Music Jesus.com

It is very hard to find to someone to accept you for you, despite it ALL; even among family. I find myself feeling regretful.....and that is not at ALL like me

Cancho Day

Out Here Grindin......

I haven't written anything in such a long time. The blog posts are few and far between, does this mean that I am so much fun that I been to busy to write...NO! LOL. I just haven't but startnig today, I am turning over a new leaf......


For you enjoyment I adding a video that symbolizes what I have been doing......lol.

http://kr.youtube.com/watch?v=mpKAA2VxWY8

Nonsenscial Rant

So today I walked in to class cold turkey. Although, I had actually prepared a lesson, but it was too much work so I switched it at the VERY last minute. I emailed myself this really cool website that had English speaking games on it. Before I well and truly get into my rant, I must explain the English Center where I work. On Wednesday's we get the kids from the elementary school that we are joined with. The other days we get kids from the surrounding schools. So as today is Wednesday, we have our home grown kids. So go into class and I pre-teach the game. All the while there is a Korean teacher wlking around "supervising." So I pull the website and we begin to play the game. Korean teacher comes back and so Vice Pricipal, numerous times. So as I teaching the Korean teacher comes back with a pen and pad and precedes to WRITE down the website, that I researched for my many minutes. Yes, I know it is a website and therefore I cannot claim owership, considering I didn't even design it, but.....I have this to say to Korean teachers who pinch websites. Why? You have so many more resources! You speak korean and English. You are in your country. You understand the written language of this country. So why would you take a English speaking website from someone who has done hours of research and brain-racking? Why?

Where You Will Go.....Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder?

Yes! I am back it has been over two months since my last post, and it has been very enventful... To say the least. I arrived in Korea. Yes, I actually took the plunge and I am now here, and have been for a little over two months. Frankly, I have this to say....I want to go home. If somebody came to me right now and said, "If you leave everything but the clothes on your body, you can go home. Right now." I would arrive in the States with no clothes, but I would be in the States.

I Stalk, Therefore I Am

I have become a log and email predator.....I check my email and all the blogs at least ten times a day. Do you think this may be lending to the reason that don't have work or packing done? Haha.
Every 30 mins. most times less, I check my email or Snafu's, Kzoo's, somebodies blog. I must, I must check. It's good a thing I don't have a job any longer 'cause if I did I would surely be fired for being on my phone.....lol. I will soon be there but for now I just have to my daily stalks in.....

All Back In

I stuffed more crap in my closet. Yea! It all fit. Trying to do something productive, school books are gathering dust and such. Waiting....Getting ready to be a bridesmaid. Hoping my makeup and clothes look ok. Want to say thanks to everyone who stops by. Thanks to Snafu and MSN for all your "hotel" help.

Cleaning Out My Closet......

In the sprit of Korea, I have started cleaning out my closet. Loads of crap, obviously I am a pack rat. Like 50 year old newpapers pack rat. I trouted it all out and got rid oof stuff, I should have gotten rid of long ago.
It has also been a very unxpected treasure trove. I found things from all the way back to elementary. Things I had forgotten, things that made me smile. Things that made made me cry.
I found notes that were passed in class and in between classes. As I was reading the notes, there were quite a few, I remembered. It was great and not so great at the same time. I have changed, and not all for the good. I lost some things that were such a part of me that they sometimes still struggle to come out. I am a different me. Yea, I know you grow and things change.....but are supposed to lose apart of yourself? Are you supposed feel so lost sometimes, that you know you will never find your way back? That you don't even want to try? I think I am going to stuff all this crap back in here and live in naive bliss for the next few years.......

The Progression

Haven't made that much progrees in any areas. No packing, no homework, no nothing. And I am not even stressing. What a change. Usaully I would be super spazzing......maybe it will hit me later. I am no longer employed, so that means I will be broke fast.....lol. I sent this totally heavy ( 37 lbs) and costly box to Korea. I hope it beats me there! So I will soon be there. Can't wait.

Woe Is Me.....

I just feel like whining today, so here I go. Today has been a trying day...I'm really tired. Been trying to pack and washing clothes and cleaning things out. Went to a job that I should have quit weeks ago, been duped into training the new hires....UUHHHHH!
Got a email from Snafu, she likes Korea, I knew she would, but hasn't received her Alien Card and is not happy about that......
Packing is still a problem. Gonna send some stuff ahead cause otherwise I would still be sitting this as* in America.
I want to give thanks to everyone who comes and reads my insane ramblings....THANKS!
I really want to give a special thanks to all my friends and family who have supported me and put up me in general even when I didn't especially deserve it. Thanks I Love Y'all Lots and I Will Miss You Much.

From the Roots...

Today I went luggage shopping. Wasn't fun for at all, cause I was accompanied. Question: "Why is it that a person who complains about everything, and whom is going to want to leave .2 seconds after you arrive insist on coming along?" Why? So I started packing and I very afraid that won't have enough room to take all the things that I need. So I am at a complete, complete loss. Help! I am in a perdiciment that I just want to rip out my hair from the roots, and that is NOT a good look. Any suggestions?

Nothing to Write About...

As the title indicates I ave nothing to write about today. The only thing on my plate is a load of graduate level course work that I haven't even cracked the book for.

"Here I Am Again On My Own......"

Dropped off my BBFFFFFFF........this morning at the airport. I'm excited and scared at the same time. Because the person that I started this whole "journey" with has moved on past ans without me. Soooo yeaaa. As a person who absolutely prides herself on self reliance I find that I cannot quite face doing this alone. So here I am debating on whether on not I cancel my ticket. Money Be Damned. But I won't come June 24th I will find find myself on a intercontinental flight wondering how I got there.
Today when we were at the local airport and she was checking her baggage and preparing to get on her flight there was such a bubble of elation surrounding her that just couldn't voice what I was thinking. I just have so many mixed emotions.
I just can't wait.......but I can.......

'Ice Ice Baby...."

I am in such a state. My BFFFFFFF.....is leaving. Friday. Without me. I was always under the impression that we would start this journey together and we are not. I don't know how to feel. I have evengone so far as to consider canceling my plane ticket. Yeaaaa. As it gets closer the colder my feet get......

Reconsidering......

Bought my plane ticket. Wishing I hadn't......

Salt Water in My Eyes

Enjoying my time at the beach. Happy I came. On a side note, salt water burns if it gets into your eyes.....bad. Pictures. Pictures!

"Beach Blanket Bingo"

Slightly happy today. Have plans to go to the beach. Even have a far-fecthed plan to sleep on the beach. Hoping that everything goes slighty like I want. Trying to shake the cloud that has settled above me.

"It's A Small World, After All...."

So today at work, I work in a photo lab, I was asked to do a passport picture so I took the customary three shots, and merrily skipped my way to the machine to print them out. As I editing them within passport guidelines, I asked, as I do with eveyone, where she was headed. Her reply was...."Korea." Could have knocked me down with a feather. So I then asked her what part she said "Yeongju." I was almost jumping up and down for, "Yeongju, with a Y?" She looked at me a little strangely at this point and said, "No, with a W."
Is it not amazing that the first passport picture I take after I received my VISA number is of another person who is heading to a consulate to get a visa? Wow. So we preceded to chat for a few minutes and she told me about some real cool phrase books she and her husband liked. You can guess what I did immediately after leaving work......bookstore bound. I went and bout them and even picked up a couple more I thought were interesting looking.
It really is a small world. Or should I say a small town near an Army base?

"Leavin' On A Jet Plane...."

So now that I have my VISA, number I have began to look for plane tickets. Ugh, an arduous process, if there ever was one. I have been to every major airlines website and signed up for many a sky miles program. I want a flight without to many stops.....Delta is looking better and better.

AlphaNumeric

So I got my VISA number last night. Quick, Quick! It may be most important alpha-numeric number I have ever received. So. Yippee!! My recruiter received my mail on Friday and my number to me Monday morning. Quick! Quick!! I say. So I guess I am Korea bound.
On a side note, I am slightly depressed, it is just a sad state of affairs to realize that someone you care about, doesn't care a half-millisecond about you like you do for them. And you only matter to friends for as much fun as you can provide.

Everything. Even the Kitchen Sink.

So I have started to make lists, yes lists, of all the things I find absolutely necessary to take to Korea with me, and I am flummoxed. Shocked. Mortified. I did not realize that it takes this much stuff for me to be me. So, I think I need to begin checking the airline regulations. Yea, I know there are some things that I can get when I get there, but.......I am pretty set in my ways and want to take what I am used too. So happy packing to me!

Save The Trees! Get Steeled!

So I have decided to veer back to the original reason for blogging. Korea. So today I went in search of......drum roll please! Chopsticks! Even though I hoping for some made of something other than wood, I didn't hav that kinda luck on my side.......so I got few of those, and since I bought so many they threw in a really nice pair. Still of made of wood though.....
Yea, I finally faced the fact that I need lots of practice. More often often than not the food winds up staying on the plate or falling back on the plate.

Wish me luck!

In My Veins

I just want to say as the time gets closer, I am super excited to go to Korea! Adventure Awaits!

The Ghost of Everything Past

"I like the dreams of the future better than the histroy of the past."
-Thomas Jefferson

The Past? Sometimes so hard to live through, and so hard to forget. If the past was good, live it up and never forget, but the memories we tend too never forget are the ones that are painful, the ones that hurt so bad that it was hard to see through to the other side, the ones that made you cry until you were hourse. Why? Why would a body who has claimed to move on and to have grown keep visiting events that take you right back to the person you were then? Is it because if you analyze EVERY minisule detail you will suddenly find something, anything that you could have done differently to keep the events from leading and ending in such a bad manner? Foresight? Even if you could back and change it, would you? This event and all the other events in your life MADE you who YOU are. Yea, even the bad ones. Everyons should have relationship end badly, just so when they enter a really grreat one they will know it. Everyone should have a relationship that ends on great terms so that they will know how to be friends with someone they were once very close to.
Although, you should never forget the past, you should never live in it.

The Art of Silence

I haven't mentioned it before because I have learned the hard way if you want something with all your heart you shouldn't mention it 'cause just as bad as you want it there is someone out there who doesn't want you to have it. I have plans to go to Korea and teach English as a Second Language (ESL). I feel as though this is a once in lifetime opportunity and I am lucky to have the chance to even be considered to do it. I have known for a long time that something was missing from me as a person, I have never been quite happy. I truly believe this because I know there is more to life and I feel like I should be experiencing it. So here I am about to traipse off to another country, continent, time zone.
Which leads me to my point, I haven't told anyone. Just my mom and one closet of the close friends. Why? I claim to be able to make my own decisions and to live my life as I so choose, so why can't I bring myself to tell the rest of my family and friends before I hop the plane? Is because verbalizing it more than a few, will bring it one step closer and everything I have known for my whole life one step further away? is it because of my belief that anything you really want you contain inside, until it has arrived and almost passed me by? Is it because I have not completely made up my mind to go and don't want to face anyone if I change my mind? Is it because I wouldn't be able to stand of the scrutiny and possible censorship if I declared my unconventional decision from the rooftops?
Is because I justcan't face the fact that I will be moving away from the support system I have known my entire life?
So what I am going to do? Am I just going to hop a plane and be gone without a word to the wise or wave to bewildered? Maybe, I am just not a strong enough person in general......? Am I taking the Art of Silence too far? Am I not believing in believing enough?

Bringing Ants to the Picnic

Although, I made a vow to post something everyday, I fear I have I fallen behind. So 5 days later here I am again. On Saturday, my mom decided to have me slight going away party/BBQ. This had been in the works for about three months, so it a really great build-up. It hasn't rained here in over a month, but you wouldn't believe it, it rained Saturday, but it was 81 degrees on Sunday. Talk about raining on a parade.
Although, it rained us out and we almost 3 hours late starting, we all good time and all the friends except two drove the mileage. So, I was almost happy. Adding to my happiness, is the fact that I finished my first semester as a graduate student, although I know, I didn't do as well as I could have, I am just proud that I can say, to have the opportunity to be a graduate student. I am the first person in my family, both sides, to graduate from college. So I am pretty proud of myself, but I think it it i time for a break. I am almost at a breaking point that I may not be able to return from. Although, I have this unreasonable fear of not being smart enough and being a failure, I have always seen education as way out, I am smart enough to realize that everything is not for me, and this breaks my heart so so so much.

Competion Amongst Friends and The Severing of Strings.

So I'm sitting here once again, thinking that I don't have time to blog.......and some questons came to the forefront of my mind. Can two friends really compete and truly remain friends? I would say yes, but mostly no. This is why. Someone will get hurt. Maybe, not intentionally, but it will happen, because someone has to be the winner and someone has to be the loser. Even "freindly" competion is not so friendly. Someone, will make it more than it needs to be.......
Yes, yes I know there are such things as good sports, but how many people truly deep down inside, will take kindly to a friend getting, beating them at something that they truly want?

Second question: When it time time to truly cut the apron strings? This question stems form the fact that I am thinkng of packing up and leaving behind everything that I have ever known. It is considered Taboo for a person past the age of 18 to still live at home, I have left and come back many a times, why is this? I have been told my whole life, "You can always come home." So why is that when I do, I have been looked down upon by people who "grown up?" Just because you moved out, and I haven't does not make you anymore of a grown-up than me. You think that because I live at home with mommy I don't have bills or responsibility, and you would be WRONG. Yea, I coud move out and go pay somebody else rent, but why would I do that when I can live here and help her PAY for this, ensuring that I, my bother, and our chidren can always have a home to come too. Proofreading this, and it appears that I am angry bitter shrew. I am far from that. I just feel that responsible adults who still reside in theirsn.
parents abode, are looked down upon as though we don't want strike out on our own.

This brings me to another point; wow for someone who could be doing anything else, this is turning into a looooonnng post; I think I shall end my rant for today and go look up Korea facts....